English holiday maker Simon Stevens has revealed that he plans to wear his West Ham kit every single day of his holiday. Despite the fact that he will stink.
Stevens, who describes himself as 'West Ham daft', is heading to Mallorca for an 18-30 holiday.
He explained, "I wear me Hammers shirt everyday on me holibobs.
"And if I'm smashed on San Mig, I'll sleep in it too."
"It defo gets a good clean at foam parties though."
Scientist Dr Henry Matthews, who has studied Brits abroad for over thirty years, believes that men wear football tops on holiday for several reasons.
"The primary rationale is that these men feel totally insignificant and lost if they don't wear it.
"Furthermore, the vinegary B.O given off by men in football tops acts as a mating scent for girls who like a, 'proper lad, not some mug.'
"Lastly, these young men use their football tops to strike up conversations in local watering holes with other like-minded morons.
"However, these can often turn into fights should something contentious arise, such as who that fit bird was actually looking at or an argument over how good Declan Rice really is."
Mr Stevens was unavailable for further comment as he is currently in hospital after a fellow holidaymaker in a Millwall top battered him senseless.
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