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Writer's pictureM.J Hughes

Situation worsens for NHS workers as 'special' Liam Gallacher gig gets go-ahead

NHS workers have been dealt yet another bitter blow after it was announced that the ex-Oasis singer has only delayed, rather than cancelled, his gig for NHS workers.


Gallagher’s announcement was met with joy from middle-aged men with Paul Weller haircuts and derision from everyone else with a modicum of taste.


Staff nurse Shirley Harding will be dragged along, screaming and kicking, by her husband.


"As hospital numbers crept up, I thought he was going to cancel. But then came the devastating news that it was only postponed.


"When will this coronavirus misery end?


“I'd rather go and see Urban Cookie Collective or 2 Unlimited than him."


“I know this is not in the spirit of things, but the moment Liam swaggers on stage I might just chuck a plastic pint of piss at him.


“I'm deeply worried that Noel might join Liam onstage for an Oasis reunion. Personally, I'm still dealing with the horror of the Stone Roses comeback.


“Can you imagine Liam and Noel plodding through one of their post-1996 album tracks?


"No doubt my daughter will be dragged along too. I don't want her being exposed to that sort of thing.


"I'll let her listen to songs about how much Nicki Minaj enjoys penis, but I draw the line at ‘Be Here Now’.”


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